Death of A Love Relationship: Suggested Resources

When it hurts to stand still next to someone and the only thing you have in common is the past, sometimes the best thing you can do for each other is walk separately towards a future and it’s there you’ll find someone who stays. ~ Kirsten Corley

Whenever there is a loss of something significant in our lives, we suffer grief. When an intimate love relationship ends – whether we were married, living together with a partner or significant other, or committed to another as part of a couple – the separation can be overwhelmingly painful. Usually for a death there is a set ritual with a funeral or memorial service, and some understanding in our culture that mourning is important. But for the death of a love relationship, there is no prescribed ritual of mourning, and the accompanying grief that is part of the divorce / breaking-up process is seldom acknowledged or accepted. The ending of a love relationship is yet another kind of death, and it is just as worthy of our understanding and support. Gathered here are a number of resources that can help.
As always, if you know of others you've found useful that you think ought to be included, let us know in the Comments section below.

Books

After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful

Changing Families: A Child’s Workbook About Divorce by Wendy Young

Coming Apart: Why Relationships End and How to Live through the Ending of Yours

Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You

Growing Wings: A View from Inside the Cocoon

How to Survive the Loss of a Love

How Can I Forgive You? The Courage to Forgive, The Freedom Not To

Invisible Heroes : Survivors of Trauma and How They Heal

Life After Loss: A Personal Guide Dealing with Death, Divorce, Job Change and Relocation

Life Is Goodbye, Life Is Hello: Grieving Well Through All Kinds of Loss

Mars and Venus Starting Over: A Practical Guide for Finding Love Again after a Painful Breakup, Divorce, or Loss of a Loved One

Moving On: Dump Your Relationship Baggage and Make Room for the Love of Your Life

Private Lies: Infidelity and Betrayal of Intimacy

Rebuilding: When Your Relationship Ends, 4th Edition

The Breakup Bible: The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing From a Breakup or Divorce

The Journey from Abandonment to Healing: Surviving the Loss of Love

The Disenfranchised: Stories of Life and Grief When an Ex-Spouse Dies

The Way of Transition: Embracing Life's Most Difficult Moments

Tough Transitions: Navigating Your Way through Difficult Times

Transcending Divorce: Ten Essential Touchstones for Finding Hope and Healing Your Heart


Websites

Death of a Relationship Links, via Grief Healing

Loss of a Love Relationship - Grief Healing Discussion Groups Online Forum


Articles

5 Truths About Breakups (That No One Ever Tells You) by Melissa Lafsky

10 Tips to Mend a Broken Heart by Therese J. Borchard

11 Pieces of BreakUp Advice From Broken-Hearted Men by Taryn Hillin

Ambiguous Loss: When Grief Threatens A Love Relationship by Marty Tousley

Ask BR: After Breakups I Experience Separation Anxiety, Obsessive Thoughts, & Anger. How Can I Handle Them Better? 

Dealing with a Breakup or Divorce: Grieving and Moving On After A Relationship Ends via HelpGuide.org

Define “Loss” by Catherine Tidd

Disenfranchised Grief: The Five Types and Reactions Explained - Interview with Ken Doka via Seven Ponds Blog

Disenfranchised Grief: When An Ex-Spouse Dies by Marty Tousley

Finding Hope and Healing after Heartbreak by Maggie DeMellier

Grief After A Breakup: Three Things You Should Know by Eleanor Haley

Grieving The Living: Losing Those Who Are Still Here by Michael Formica

How Can A Relationship Survive Grief? by Natalie Morris

How Grief Colours Our Brain: Why Do We Become Illogical After A Relationship Breaks Up? by Lakshana N Palat

How Modern Society Complicates The Grief of Heartbreak by Rohitha Naraharisetty

How Not To Respond To News Of A Divorce by Kristin Tennant

How to Get Over A Breakup by Christine Baumgartner

How to Get Over a Breakup by Juan Moyano

How to Get Over A Breakup or Divorce by Luisa Tam

How to Move On After Divorce, And How Long It Really Takes via The Huffington Post 

In Grief: Can This Relationship Survive? by Marty Tousley

In Grief: Death of A Marriage by Marty Tousley

In Grief: Mourning A Lost Love by Marty Tousley

In Grief: Supporting A Partner in Mourning by Marty Tousley

Is Grief A Normal Reaction to Divorce? by Marty Tousley

Kissing Frogs: A Case for Conscious Grieving by Judy Warren

Letting Go and Moving On After A Breakup or Divorce by Danielle B. Grossman

Mother's Death Threatens Couple's Love Relationship by Marty Tousley

“Radio Silence”: Making a Case for Not Talking to an Ex by Judy Warren

Shattered Dreams of Love: Heartache and Grief by Mary C. Lamia

The Healing Power of Heartbreak: Why We Should All Have This Painful Experience by Robi Ludwig

This Just Might Be The Smartest Way To Get Over Your Ex by Brittany Wong

Uncommon Advice to Heal a Broken Heart by Susan Piver

Understanding When To Let Go And Why Endings That Hurt Even Happen by Kirsten Corley 

Voices of Experience: On Dating A Girl Without A Mother by Jenna Rose Lowthert  

Who Gets thePet In A Divorce? via WikiHow

Why Our Need for Closure Makes Us Selfish by Mark Travis Rivera

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below.If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Image by Violinka from Pixabay

© by Marty Tousley, RN, MS, FT