Grief Healing: Understanding and Managing Grief, November 26

Best selections from Grief Healing's X feed this week:

After experiencing a loss, the first year can be one of the most challenging times in the grieving process. Whether it’s a holiday, birthday, or anniversary, those firsts without your loved one present can trigger complicated feelings. Though the firsts aren’t easy, there are things you can do to help make them a little more tolerable. Tips on how to cope with grief during year of firsts « Clarksville Now

It's an upsetting thought that at some point, all of us will be impacted by grief. Whether it's the loss of a loved one, the passing of a pet or having to say farewell to a close friend, grief hits us all differently and can leave many of us feeling lost and alone. In honour of Grief Awareness Week, we spoke to BACP-accredited therapists about the one thing they want their clients to know about grief. We hope it brings comfort to anyone struggling this week. What therapists want you to know about grief « Hello! Magazine

My “time served” didn’t lessen the pain or the length of my sentence. I just processed it all a little differently than those shocked by their loss. Not better, not worse, just different. We’ve all been left. The world moves on, creeping forward one excruciating day at a time with no concern for who’s taking part. Making our way through grief can feel like we are swimming through syrup. It is thick, sticky, and gets on everything. Every action takes so much more additional effort. Then, when you look behind you, exhausted and fighting to stay above the surface, you realize you’ve barely moved from where you were. And there are the times when no forward motion seems possible. You are stagnant, treading tar. Navigating grief is like ‘swimming through syrup,’ one bereaved mom says. How she’s managing to stay afloat « Fortune Well

"For those who had a very close-knit relationship, like the Carters clearly did – they were partners, they were soulmates and been together since they were children – it's a profound loss because every aspect of everyday life changes for them, and the loss of their confidant and helper and soulmate, really, it's taken away," said Dr. Deborah Carr, a sociologist at Boston University who studies grief in older adults. After a lifetime together, surviving spouses can be vulnerable in grief « WBAL-TV 11

[G]rieving in America is so tough for two main reasons. First, our culture doesn’t give people enough time and space to grieve properly. Grief is a long process that rarely follows a set path. But we often expect people to feel better and “get back to normal” as little as a day or two after losing someone or something (job, home, relationship) they care about. Secondly, American culture is centered on positive thinking and wellness routines but avoids topics like death and sadness, failing to support those who are grieving. Yet, 68% of Americans report wanting a more open dialogue around grief. Why It’s So Tough to Grieve in America « USA Today

Even well-meaning comments can be hurtful. Social workers interviewed grieving parents about 'insensitive' consolation. Sympathy cards revealed just how prevalent some of these messages are. The new study reveals that some of the most hurtful comments have to do with timing: suggesting that someone should be over their grief soon, when in reality grief can be extremely long-lasting. Revealed: What NOT to say when consoling the bereaved, according to scientists « Daily Mail

The loss of a pet affects both humans and animals in the rest of the family. Animals often react similarly to humans following unexpected loss of a loved one and/or tribe member. Glutocorticoids are stress hormones that are elevated after traumatic events in both humans and animals. Does Your Pet Grieve the Way You Do? « Psychology Today

With the death of a loved one comes grief — the natural mental, emotional, spiritual, physical and social reaction when a loved one dies. In the United States, most young people will experience bereavement or the death of a family member or friend by the time they reach high school graduation.1 In fact, 1 in 12 U.S. children will experience the death of a parent or sibling by age 18. Each one of these kids will experience grief in their own unique way. When a Loved One Dies: Helping Kids Cope with Grief « Boys & Girls Club of America

Most of what we see and hear about grief is focused on the early stages when the loss is at its most raw. Maybe it’s because that’s considered to be the more ‘interesting’ phase, but what I want to focus on here is that part where the healing process feels like it’s just beginning. When do you get over grief? « Image

For Jimmy Carter and others, the loss of a life partner is a uniquely painful, disorienting experience, experts say. Loss is a universally painful experience. But medical data and first-hand accounts suggests that grief is more acute – and even deleterious to the surviving partner’s health – when someone loses a long-term spouse. Losing a long-term spouse and the shattering of a shared identity « The Atlanta Journal-Constitution

"Last month I found out that my co-worker 'love' of seven years ago had died in a one-car accident earlier this year. I feel like I'm going crazy! For months after he disappeared, I had wondered 'why' and 'what if,' but I thought I was all over that by now. It's been seven years, I made a life without him, and I never even thought about him. Well, not very much. But now, I can't seem to get over him. I find myself fantasizing about what would have happened if we'd been together, dreaming about him, and wanting him again." In Grief: Mourning The Loss of A Dream « Grief Healing

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