Voices of Experience: The Gift of Goodbye

 

Rebecca Whitehead Munn is passionate about rethinking possible and brings intellectual humility to all of her endeavors, including several teaching roles at the master’s level. Her passion in writing is to demystify taboo topics, such as cancer and death, and to inspire others to be courageous and learn about their loved ones’ wishes, while creating lasting connections. In this excerpt from her book, The Gift of Goodbye: A Story of Agape Love, she shares part of her personal story of walking the End of Life path with her mother. 

While I felt very lucky to have the gift of time to say goodbye over a long period, it was quite a struggle to manage my grief and pain day by day. One of the tools I used for support and calm in the storm was getting regular massages to help my body release its sadness. When I visited Mom in Austin, I continued this practice and extended it to her. We would have someone come to Mom’s house, and we would both enjoy the peace we felt following every treatment.

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, October 11 - October 17, 2020

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week: 

"I’ve heard of something called palliative care, but I don’t understand it and no doctor has mentioned it. Can you help me?"  Confused About Palliative Care Vs. Hospice Care? You Aren’t Alone « Egosan

Music for A Pet Loss Service

Music speaks to my soul in a way that mere words cannot . . . Through music the emotions of grief are shared.   ~ Tanya Lord

A reader writes:  Hi, Marty! I am a Music Therapist and I am providing music for a grief pet loss service next month. Do you know of any songs that might be of comfort to people mourning the death of their pet? Maybe you could ask others who are mourning the death of their pet. Thank You for any help you can offer!

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, October 11 - October 17, 2020

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week: 

Pediatric nurse practitioner Deborah Fisher spent her early career working in intensive care units. The experience convinced her that more needed to be done to improve end-of-life care for children. A nurse practitioner’s Brief But Spectacular take on end-of-life care for children « PBS News Hour

When Attending A Funeral Triggers Grief

Find the latest version of this post here:

In Grief: Saying The Wrong Thing at A Funeral

A reader writes: I don't know why I'm so unable to say the right thing at the right time but for some reason I just seem to put my foot into my mouth and make so many ridiculous comments. I decided to go to a funeral of a person I was acquainted with through a church activity group. She died last Sunday and her funeral was yesterday. All I could do was think about my mom and I was crying for the loss of my mom more so than I was crying for the loss of this friend. I felt sadness for her family and could see they were going through the same things that I did when my mom died three months ago.

Understanding and Managing Grief, October 4 - October 10, 2020

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Books can help students feel less alone by showing characters who have experienced something similar. Depending on the content, they can also help students understand complex feelings, explain the facts and permanence of death, or even help students connect with memories of their deceased loved one. Books Are Essential Tools to Help Children Manage Grief « Education Post

Dating A Widow: How Can I Connect with Her Adolescent Daughter?

Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit.  ~ Aristotle

A reader writes: I'm not sure how to handle situations that develop between my friend's widow, myself and her kids. Don was my friend for many years. We played football together in high school. I've known his wife Sarah since kindergarten. Don and Sarah met in highschool and were later married. Don passed away two years ago in an accident. Sarah and I have rekindled our friendship and it's grown into a love affair. They had two kids together. Their son is 15 and their daughter is 17. The 17-year-old can't get used to the idea of "someone taking her Dad's place". I don't want to take Don's place. I want my own place in their lives. What can I do to connect with the daughter? How can I let her know it's O.K. to accept me as a friend not a father figure? Will she ever allow her mom to find romance again? Thank you for your thoughts on this.

Understanding and Managing Grief, September 27 - October 3, 2020

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Years after the devastating loss of a child, I live a happy, meaningful life once again. Yet the cycle of grief has predictable triggers. The Continuing Cycle of Grief « Alive In Memory

The pandemic is an opportunity to create a new language of mourning. To forge new ritual. How can we honor the dead in the universe of ourselves, of our homes? The Water, the Grief « Los Angeles Review of Books