Understanding and Managing Grief, December 24 - December 30, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Holiday Break: A Lesson from the Animals, http://j.mp/2E0sCST « Grief Healing

The Gift of Presence, The Perils of Advice, http://j.mp/2pU1XEw « On Being

What My Dog Taught Me About End of Life, http://j.mp/2pCNk8v « Care Dimensions - Voices of Care

Once Again It's Christmas

Like snowflakes
floating gently,
unexpectedly to earth, 

small kindnesses touch our lives. 

First one and then another and another,

until at last the world is bright and shining with goodwill.

And once again it's Christmas.

Caregiving and Hospice, December 17 - December 23, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Caregiver Abuse: The Role of Personality and Illness, http://j.mp/2DmXaxS « Stan Goldberg, Ph.D.

The Long Goodbye: Coping With Sadness And Grief Before A Loved One Dies,  http://j.mp/2p7Cxmt « California Healthline

How Will the Story End? http://j.mp/2BbrD4s « HuffPost

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, December 17 - December 23, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Coping with The Holidays: Suggested Resources, http://j.mp/2iRxyQr « Grief Healing

How this doctor deals with loss, http://j.mp/2DmzxFH « Kevin MD

What About the Body? http://j.mp/2DpuC78 « GriefPerspectives

In Grief: When the Pain of Loss Won’t Go Away

[Reviewed and updated August 10, 2023]

It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.  ~ Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy

A reader writes: I wrote to you some time ago regarding a friend who had died by suicide. It's been two years now, and the pain is still just as strong now as it was when I first wrote to you. I've tried talking to family and friends. I've heard that talking about it will help ease the pain. Well, it doesn't. It makes me hurt that much more.

Caregiving and Hospice, December 10 - December 16, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Loneliness Can Be Deadly for Elders; Friends Are the Antidote, http://j.mp/2yuGtgv « The New York Times

Death Without Duality: Three Both/Ands at the End of Life, http://j.mp/2yuBVXu « On Being

Do the Russians Always Cheat? http://j.mp/2AHZLoI « Medpage Today

Understanding and Managing Grief, December 10 - December 16, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Coping with grief during the holidays, http://j.mp/2yE1Uvu « Fox 10 News

The grief chronicles: Reflections from those who loved and lost during the past year, http://j.mp/2yF0Bwd « The Washington Post

A Millennial's Guide to Grief in a Digital World, http://j.mp/2yvcHYO « Crossroads Hospice and Palliative Care

Voices of Experience: A Butterfly

Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.  ~ Eskimo Proverb

Anne Bardsley believes in angels. She is the author of Angel Bumps, Hello From Heaven, a collection of tender stories from those who've received signs from their departed loved ones, reassuring them that they are still near in spirit. In this excerpt, Anne describes the signs she's received from her own mom that inspired her to gather similar stories from others, all demonstrating her firm belief that while people die, love is eternal.

A week after my mom passed, I was driving to work in tears. The reality of her death sank in that morning. I felt like an orphan. All of the tears that I’d held inside to be strong at the funeral, let loose. I just needed to know she was in Heaven and at peace, without pain. I asked her for a sign to assure me. I felt a hand rest ever so lightly on my right cheek, and I smiled and said: “What the heck was that, Mom?”

Caregiving and Hospice, December 3 - December 9, 2017

Best selection from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Pets, peace of mind, and the end of life, http://j.mp/2jdYOd0 « WRVO Public Media

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, December 3 - December 9, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Gratitude Amid Grief, http://j.mp/2BYJfgV « Grieve Well

A Very Brady Christmas (But Way More Complicated), http://j.mp/2BRjcHo « Modern Loss

Feeling Lonely and Isolated in Grief, http://j.mp/2BPgNgq « The Grief Toolbox

In Grief: Grandsons Affected by Traumatic Loss

Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone.  ~ Fred Rogers

A reader writes: My grandsons ages 4 and 7 lost their mom in a tragic single-car accident in which she had been drinking. The night of the accident the babies stayed with a friend of theirs while their mommy went to a friend’s birthday party and when they woke up they had no mom. They were never allowed back in their home, and life as they knew it had simply vanished. The 4-year-old is now 5 and is acting so badly in kindergarten they are talking medication for ADHD—he told us how his mom died and is so-matter-of -fact that you can feel the anger in his voice. A year prior to her death her father (their best friend) died of a heart attack while the younger boy (then age 3) was with him. The 8-year-old acts as the caregiver and basically seems to have shut down. They have had two therapists now and they've both quit on them. Please help. They are so young to experience so much trauma.

Caregiving and Hospice, November 26 - December 2, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

The Emotions of the Dying, http://j.mp/2j7CcdP « Pallimed

Giving permission–the final gift – A "Dummies" Guide To Learning To Live As A Patient Instead Of A Nurse, http://j.mp/2j4BdLr « Autonomic RN

4 Tips for Caregivers of Someone with Serious Illness, http://bit.ly/2jvJO9F « Care Dimensions

Understanding and Managing Grief, November 26 - December 2, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Grieving The Living: When your “lost” loved one is still alive, http://j.mp/2BDqIXe « HuffPost

What to Keep When Someone Dies, http://j.mp/2BlOFl5 « Modern Loss

Why does God let bad things happen to us? http://bit.ly/2Ae7EjZ « Terri Daniel on YouTube

Pet Loss: Delayed Grief

[Reviewed and updated June 12, 2022]

A lie that is half-truth is the darkest of all lies.  ~ Alfred Tennyson

A reader writes: Hi, I found your website and thought that maybe you could explain something to me. I am 32 years old. I am married with two wonderful small children. I have a great life. I just found out from my parents that my rabbit, Precious, who died 13 years ago, did not pass away the way I had been told.

Caregiving and Hospice, November 19 - November 25, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Care for the dying does not mean obstinately resisting death, pope says, http://j.mp/2jkOcYU « The Tablet

Why Does Earlier Hospice Care Improve the End of Life? http://j.mp/2jkYsAe « Seven Ponds Blog

How Older Patients Can Dodge Pitfalls Entrenched In Health Care System, http://j.mp/2A77lFR « Kaiser Health News

Understanding and Managing Grief, November 19 - November 25, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Widower's Grief: Rituals of Community and Grief, http://j.mp/2jjwG7a « Widower's Grief

New online tool helps caregivers support children in times of grief, http://j.mp/2A4p7t3 « Cision

Voices of Experience: Love, Snow and Meyer Lemons, http://j.mp/2zVvvml « Grief Healing

Coping with Pet Loss, November 19 - November 25, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Why parents shouldn’t lie about pet's passing,  http://j.mp/2A5BTrq « Vancouver 24 hrs

Pet Loss and the Holidays: Four Things To Consider When Grieving During the Holidays, http://j.mp/2jkkfbj « Animals in Our Hearts

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Voices of Experience: Love, Snow & Meyer Lemons

While we have the gift of life, it seems to me the only tragedy is to allow part of us to die: whether it is our spirit, our creativity, or our glorious uniqueness.  ~ Gilda Radner

Sydney Chaney Thomas lost her husband in July 2016 when he died of a heart attack. His death was sudden and unexpected, as he was just 55 years old and thought to be in good heath. Sydney now lives in Northern California where she is raising her two daughters, ages 16 and 17. Sydney is an instructor in Marketing at UC Berkeley's International Diploma Certification Program, and author of a cookbook titled Real Food for Real People. She co-founded The Trident Project, a non-profit that does global water testing to fight ocean acidification. She also co-founded Ocean SF, an adventure-wear clothing company that designs and makes quality sailing apparel. Her popular lifestyle blog SydneyChaneyThomas.com reflects her varied interests, her love for the environment and her entrepreneurial spirit ~ as well as her personal experience with grief.

Understanding and Managing Grief, November 12 - November 18, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

"Conversational Narcissism" ~ an excellent read on grief response: The Mistake I Made with My Grieving Friend, http://j.mp/2zU65pg « Oprah.com

Grief Is Good, http://j.mp/2iZZP7m « OptionB.Org

STOP! Read This Before You Post Another RIP on Social Media, http://bit.ly/2inAip5 « Grief Watch

Coping with Pet Loss, November 12 - November 18, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Horse Owners Urge Others to Plan for Equine End of Life, http://j.mp/2j1ObJk « World Horse Welfare

Dr. Carmack one of the world's first Certified Hospice and Palliative Care Veterinarians, http://j.mp/2j1OXGc « Hampton Roads Veterinary Hospice

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Coping with The Holidays: Suggested Resources 2017

[Most recent update: June 10, 2018]

Coping with loss is even harder during the holidays. What used to be a festive time of decorations and parties — laughter and togetherness — now seems meaningless. We’re paralyzed by the thought of shopping and socializing. How can we continue old traditions like nothing has changed? Because everything has changed . . .  ~ Lynn Sue Cooney

In my daily travels around the Internet, I am always on the lookout for helpful articles and reliable resources that I can recommend and share with my readers. This is especially important during the holiday season, which for many mourners and caregivers can be a difficult and challenging time.

Caregiving and Hospice, November 5 - November 11, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

How Volunteering for Hospice Changed My Life, http://j.mp/2iHlX6q « Care Dimensions

#MeToo shows why women must learn sexual self-defense, http://j.mp/2hcAyXf « Kevin MD

The painful side of positive health care marketing, http://j.mp/2haX7LC « Kevin MD

Understanding and Managing Grief, November 5 - November 11, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

How Can We Open Our Hearts to Grief? http://j.mp/2iP4p8i « SevenPonds Blog

Here's one blogger who writes on grief, http://j.mp/2iOl3F0 « Twitter, @bfotoronto

Everyone's Talking about Grief - And for Good Reason, http://j.mp/2iK3FkO « Verily

Veterans Day 2017

Honor to the soldier and sailor everywhere, who bravely bears his country’s cause. Honor, also, to the citizen who cares for his brother in the field and serves, as he best can, the same cause. ~ Abraham Lincoln

Americans across the country celebrate Veterans Day on November 11, a special day to salute the men and women who have bravely served our country in the military.

These fellow Americans ~ and their family members ~ have made profound sacrifices in defense of freedom and they deserve our heartfelt thanks, appreciation and support.

The liberty that we citizens enjoy comes at a price paid by these valiant men and women. May we all make sure we do our part to recognize and support them throughout their lives.

To all our nation’s veterans and their families, a sincere and heartfelt thank you.

Caregiving and Hospice, October 29 - November 4, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

November is National Hospice and Palliative Care Month! Let's celebrate the wonderful end of life care that hospice and palliative care can give! http://j.mp/2h1Mx9M « Hospice Action Network

Defining Dignity at End of Life: One Question to Ask Hospice Patients, http://j.mp/2iwEWR4 « Pallimed

Linda Campanella: Why Are We in Denial about Death? http://j.mp/1nMTc7u « Pittsburgh Better Times

Understanding and Managing Grief, October 29 - November 4, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Grief Woke Me Up and Now I Can't Go Back to Sleep, http://j.mp/2iueEyH « Second Firsts

Alison Miller: Ghost Dancing Into Our Forever, http://j.mp/2inqg6Q « Soaring Spirits International

Halloween Horror — Hurt or Help Your Grieving Friends, http://j.mp/2z1ZNUh « What to Say When Someone Dies

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Coping with Pet Loss, October 29 - November 4, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Pet's quality of life is key to knowing when the end is near, http://j.mp/2iqvlv5 « The Post and Courier

How a Pet Hospice Vet Can Help Your Senior Dog, http://bit.ly/2otGHR9 « Dogster

How to Care and Support a Dying Animal, http://j.mp/2iqNYPo « Healthy Pets

Pet Loss: When Nothing Eases The Pain

[Reviewed and updated July 19, 2022]

There is sorrow enough in the natural way / From men and women to fill our day / But when we are certain of sorrow in store / Why do we always arrange for more? / Brothers and sisters, I bid you beware / Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.  ~ Rudyard Kipling

A reader writes: It has been 17 months since my husband and I lost our deeply loved dog Buddy. Yes he was old - unsure of his age as he was a stray who showed up at our house at an estimated 2-3 years old and we had him for 13 years. But other than arthritis, due to obvious abuse, injuries and neglect before he was either thrown away or (we hope) he escaped, he was lively, healthy and so so happy. We have no children, so you can imagine how he became the center of our then very newly married life, and remained so for 13 years. We preferred his company to anyone else's by far and created a life of "the three amigos".

Caregiving and Hospice, October 22 - October 28, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Fact Sheet: Falls - The Biggest Threat to Senior Health and Safety, http://j.mp/2z0YEhF « Aging.com

Learning About 'Ambiguous Loss' Helps Some Caregivers Cope With Grief, http://j.mp/2yR7kVN  « KJZZ 91.5

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, October 22 - October 28, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Loss of a Spouse: 5 Things Only a Widow/er Understands,  http://j.mp/2yZ6SXr « The Grief Toolbox

Trust Me As I Grieve, http://j.mp/2yYFZTM « What's Your Grief ?

Lin Sue Cooney: Coping with grief during holidays, http://j.mp/2yTFOqE « AZ Central

In Grief: Brother's Dating Causes Family Conflict

[Reviewed and updated October 16, 2022]

Don't look at me in that tone of voice.  ~ Dorothy Parker

A reader writes: There is so much to this story that I could write a book on this but I will try to make it brief. One day last fall, my husband and I were awakened at 6 in the morning to learn that my husband's younger brother had been murdered by one of his employees. We are all in in several states away. Their father died 10 yrs ago of cancer, and besides their mother there are seven brothers and sisters in this family. This brother was the only one who lived far from home. He was 34 and for 15 years had been living with his girlfriend; together they had a son who is now 2 years old. Needless to say, the shock ,anger, denial and a range of emotions all set in, and no two family members reacted the same. For the past several months, the deceased brother's girlfriend and son have been down here for numerous visits. My husband's younger brother and this girlfriend have shocked all the family by starting a relationship, which has set off a new depression among several of the family members.

Understanding and Managing Grief, October 15 - October 21, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Why Do Friendships Change After a Significant Loss? http://j.mp/2guyTvQ «The 5 Facets

Finding the Safe, Helpful People We Need, http://j.mp/2gu03q8 « The Grief Toolbox

Coping With What You Can't Control, http://j.mp/2gvNVVv « Psych Central

Coping with Pet Loss, October 15 - October 21, 2017

Best selection from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Inside the growing trend of animal hospice and palliative care, http://j.mp/2gs5eTX « King 5

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Voices of Experience: My Final Blog

The end of one chapter is just the beginning of another. Read on ... The best part is always yet to come. ~ Susan Gale

Michelle Midgett was 31 years old when she lost Joey, her husband of seven years and father of their four children. She writes that since her husband died she has learned a lot about herself and life. "I choose to keep fighting and my goal is to help others find that fire inside them and keep moving." The following essay appeared originally on the Soaring Spirits International blog, and is reprinted here with Michelle's permission.

Caregiving and Hospice, October 8 - October 14, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Palliative Care at the Vatican, http://j.mp/2yiQaCd « HuffPost

What the Dying Need from Us, http://j.mp/2ylwYnv « Hospicare

How I Encouraged My Dad to Start Hospice 'Early,' http://j.mp/2yjUd0S « Life Matters Media

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, October 8 - October 14, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

In grief: A Glimmer of Hope, http://j.mp/2ghEPf9 « HuffPost

What *should* you say when someone dies? http://j.mp/2ggveVK « Refuge In Grief

7 Years Later, http://j.mp/2fWHQxD « The Grief Toolbox

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Coping with Pet Loss, October 8 - October 14, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Grieving for a pet can take many forms and duration can vary, vet says, http://j.mp/2gf1t7U « Kansas State University

I've been there: Pet grief support comes to Philly, http://bit.ly/2yj0xG3 « Philadelphia Inquirer

Pet grief: When you lose your most faithful friend, http://j.mp/2ga6Jtd « Daily Mail Online

Loving A Pet Too Much: When Bonding May Be Unhealthy

Find the latest version of this post here:

Too Attached to A Pet? When Bonding May Be Unhealthy

A reader writes: In my opinion there are just too many people around the world who love their pets more than they love people. Do you have any more detailed information\articles outlining signs of unhealthy relationships with pets? Or maybe you can point me in the right direction.

Caregiving and Hospice, October 1 - October 7, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

NHPCO Report: Hospice patients with short period of service continues to be a concern, http://j.mp/2fQeCjQ « Markets Insider

Book Review: "Life After the Diagnosis" by Dr. Steven Z. Pantilat, http://j.mp/2fO9TyY « Seven Ponds Blog

Stunning Poem on Living with Depression: "Having It Out with Melancholy," http://j.mp/2hHjsE7 « Brain Pickings

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, October 1 - October 7, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Resources for emotional trauma support for you and people you love, http://j.mp/2fR0CGx « Danielle Laporte

Megan Devine Interview: The Howl at the Center of Grief, http://j.mp/2hQHE73 « Audio Boom

Dogs Comfort The Bereaved in Funeral Homes, http://j.mp/2fL2KzK « Seven Ponds Blog

In Grief: Infant’s Death Threatens A Marriage

[Reviewed and updated November 3, 2019]

New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings.  ~ Lao Tzu

A reader writes: My wife and I just lost our daughter. She was only 26 days old at the time. I was stationed overseas the whole time, but was home for the death. My wife and I got married shortly after our daughter’s death. Then I returned to Afghanistan to finish my tour. My wife now wants an annulment on our marriage and has moved to a different city. She still says she wants a relationship with me, just wants us to start over. Is this normal behavior?

Caregiving and Hospice, September 24 - September 30, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Don't let new Nurse Ratched show be an American Horror Story for real nurses! http://j.mp/2fyJqpe « Change.org

Physicians have the power to save our health care system, http://j.mp/2fyrX0e « Kevin MD

Five Years Sober, http://j.mp/2fwF7L4 « Musings of a Distractible Mind

Understanding and Managing Grief, September 24 - September 30

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Living in the Shadow of a Child’s Death, http://j.mp/2fzDw78 « Alive in Memory

Why it's OK to use social media to mourn, http://j.mp/2hzq04e « Mashable

Widowhood: The Club Nobody Wants to Join, http://j.mp/2hsgrrp « HuffPost

In Grief: When A Friend Pulls Away

Find the latest version of this post here: 

When A Grieving Friend Refuses Offers of Support

A reader writes: I am hoping you can advise me what to do. I have a very dear and close friend whose brother died of suicide a month ago. This was his only sibling. He had to go identify the body and had to come home to a hysterical wife and barely functioning parents. As far as I know he has cried very little if at all. He and I haven't been able to discuss anything at all. My husband and I did everything we could to help the family with things. The problem is now though he will not call anymore and he has pulled away emotionally. He is saying things to me that I would say are hurtful. I have been trying to keep in touch with him, but now he says we are not compatible. I really want to help him through this very tough time. Do I step back and give him space or what do I do??? I am hoping you can give me some guidance. Thank you.

Caregiving and Hospice, September 17 - September 23, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

How to Use Death Insurance to Trick Death, http://j.mp/2hoJYlN « Open to Hope

YouTube Series "Molly's Movement" Shows What Coping with Dementia Looks Like, http://j.mp/2hp8QGp « Seven Ponds Blog

One Last Visit to See My Patient, http://j.mp/2hml0zO « The New York Times

Understanding and Managing Grief, September 17 - September 23, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Helping Others to Help Yourself, http://j.mp/2hn3gI4 « Grieve Well

5 Ways Grieving Kids Changed My Own Relationship with Loss, http://j.mp/2hlPju5 « Modern Loss

How to Cope with Anticipatory Grief and Ambiguous Loss, http://j.mp/2hlNjhy « Next Avenue

Voices of Experience: Always

Stand Up Album - Christina Holmes

When you're happy, you enjoy the music. But, when you're sad, you understand the lyrics.  ~ Frank Ocean

Christina Holmes is a singer, songwriter, musician and producer who has recently released her sophomore album, Stand Up, under her label, Cove House Records. The original soundtrack contains ten new songs written by Christina, and her album serves as a call for social justice and change. She has been creating her own music for years, but when her father succumbed to kidney disease and died of kidney failure, she took two years of finding her way through grief before she felt able to show her musical soul again.

Caregiving and Hospice, September 10 - September 16, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Staying Calm in a Hurricane - Guided Imagery Do's and Don'ts, http://j.mp/2xnlXRX « Health Journeys

Art from the Heart - the role of art therapy in palliative care, http://j.mp/2flbi0s « Alberta Hospice Palliative Care Association

Beautiful: Seventysomething: When it's time to stop fixing life's holes, http://j.mp/2eRMJY5 « PBS NewsHour

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, September 10 - September 16, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Yes, You Can Measure Grief And Here’s How, http://j.mp/2h9xnT9 « Grieve Well

Remembering the 'Lasts,' http://j.mp/2eZW8wV « Open to Hope

I Can't Live Without You, http://j.mp/2eZSGSZ « Mourning Coffee for the Mourning Soul

Coping with Pet Loss, September 10 - September 16, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

What does pet care have to do with human hospice? http://j.mp/2fk7GeT « Healthy Waterloo Region

Pet Euthanasia: When Is It Time to Say Goodbye? http://j.mp/2xgDUBI « Grief Healing

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Pet Euthanasia: When Is It Time to Say Goodbye?

[Reviewed and updated November 15, 2021]

Deep down we somehow always knew this journey would end. We knew that if we gave our hearts they would be broken. But give them we must for it is all they ask in return. When the time comes, and the road curves ahead to a place we cannot see, we give one final gift and let them run on ahead — young and whole once more. ~ Crystal Ward Kent

A reader writes: Can I ask for your advice? I’m sure the answer lies within me, not you, but maybe you can help.

Caregiving and Hospice, September 3 - September 9, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Guided Imagery Now On An "Approved for Use" List at the VHA, http://j.mp/2eLTrih « Health Journeys

Brilliant: Honor the person and the work with "The Pause," http://j.mp/2eKAk8d « Jonathan Bartels on Vimeo

How Can Palliative Care Improve Quality of Life? http://j.mp/2w3MKOJ « Seven Ponds Blog

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, September 3 - September 9, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Are you grieving "for" a not so nice person? See "What's In A Preposition? A Grammar for Grieving," http://j.mp/2xcgwFv « Offbeat Compassion

Finding Hope Again, http://j.mp/2eMkcDo « The Grief Toolbox

Romance May Not Be the Answer after Loss, http://j.mp/2eM81Xi « Second Firsts

Coping with Pet Loss, September 3 - September 9, 2017

Best selection from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Sunday, September 10 is National Pet Memorial Day, http://j.mp/1649Pjw « Grief Healing

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

In Grief: When Counseling Isn’t Helping

[Reviewed and updated December 31, 2023]

If there is no struggle, there is no progress.  ~ Frederick Douglas

A reader writes: Well it seems I am not doing any better now since both my parents have died. And I have no doubt that this is hurting me more than anyone else in the family. My Mom and I lived together and she knew me better than all of them and I knew her better than all of them. The only person in my family that probably knew my Mom as well as I did was my Dad.

But anyway, I just can't make any progress and feel I am in an endless pit of grief, mourning, sorrow, and despair. Tonight I asked God to just take me. I don't want to be here anymore. I am sick of it and sick of it ALL!

Caregiving and Hospice, August 27 - September 2, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Palliative Care Can Support You At Diagnosis, http://j.mp/2vQIa6m « Get Palliative Care

Stop telling people they're fighters who will 'beat' terminal illness, http://j.mp/2wD8LIL « USA Today

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, August 27 - September 2, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Grieving May Be Lonely (But it Doesn't Have to Be), http://j.mp/2vVmAhg « Open to Hope

Healing Grief through the Gift of Volunteering, http://bit.ly/hO4In3 « Grief Healing

Attachment Is the Source of All Suffering, http://j.mp/2wmizFZ « Psychology Today

Coping with Pet Loss, August 27 - September 2, 2017

Best selection from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

In-home pet hospice eases pain for animals and their people, http://j.mp/2wCRMq4  « QCOnline.com

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Voices of Experience: A Reflection on Grief and Mourning

Source

Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity.  ~ Henry Van Dyke

As Senior Director of the Jewish Hospice and Chaplaincy Network, Rabbi Joseph H. Krakoff has worked for many years with adults and children wrestling with death, grief and remembrance. While in Rabbinical School at the Jewish Theological Seminary in New York City, he developed a thought-provoking text to share with families, guiding them through honest conversations about the legacy and values that remain even as someone dearly loved has died.

Caregiving and Hospice, August 20 - August 26, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

How Do We Improve Communication About Palliative Care? http://j.mp/2wdiZNj « SevenPonds Blog

10 Sanity-Saving Long Distance Caregiving Tips, http://j.mp/2wv3vqp « Caring.com

Active vs. Passive: a Key Difference between Mindfulness and Guided Imagery, http://j.mp/2w8HmLU « Health Journeys

Understanding and Managing Grief, August 20 - August 26, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

“Closure” by Kelly Farley, http://j.mp/2wxsWb5 « Grieving Dads

Grief Healing Discussion Groups is part of Option B's Group Directory and follows its community guidelines, http://j.mp/2w8lNLF « Option B

The Hollow Days, http://j.mp/2wrrmaw «Widower's Grief

Coping with Pet Loss, August 20 - August 26, 2017

Best selection from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Veterinary social work opens outlet for grief, stress of pet loss, http://j.mp/2wrAWdw  « Business Mirror 

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

In Grief: When Offers to Help Are Rejected

Source

[Reviewed and updated  March 3, 2024]

There is but one freedom. To put oneself right with death. After that, everything is possible. I cannot force you to believe in God. Believing in God amounts to coming to terms with death. When you have accepted death, the problem of God will be solved—and not the reverse.  ~ Albert Camus

A reader writes: My very wonderful aunt who has done much to nurture me as I was growing up, has suffered a huge loss in her life. Her husband of 49 years died three months ago from complications from heart disease. My husband is a minister, I have read a lot about grieving and the different stages of grieving, I have suffered the loss of my father 9 years ago from a long illness, but I have not been prepared for the devastating grief and crying that my aunt is experiencing. I feel helpless to help her.

Caregiving and Hospice, August 13 - August 19, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Nurses share a side to their profession that most people don't see, http://j.mp/2vP3qeC « Business Insider

12 tips for giving patients bad news, http://j.mp/2vOUnKG « Kevin MD

End-of-life advice: More than 500,000 chat on Medicare’s dime, http://j.mp/2vCf8Jd « USA Today

Understanding and Managing Grief, August 13 - August 19, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

The Greatest Fears of Grief, http://j.mp/2vMDdNF « GriefMinisterdotcom

When the 'U' Word Is Missing, Grievers Suffer, http://j.mp/2w5TwHR « Stunned By Grief

Do You Really Never Get Over Losing A Child? http://j.mp/2vGUS9y « Grieve Well

Coping with Pet Loss, August 13 - August 19, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Pet Hospice: Why You Should Consider It, http://j.mp/2vPpN3s  « Pet MD

Children and Pet Loss: Following Their Lead, http://j.mp/2vV8gtj « Grief Healing

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Children and Pet Loss: Following Their Lead

[Reviewed and updated March 19, 2020]

The moment I decided to follow instead of lead, I discovered the joys of becoming a part of a small child's world.  ~ Janet Gonzalez-Mena

A reader writes: I wrote to you earlier about the death of our dog -- our wonderful and loving companion of 15 years -- as we needed some poetry and appropriate messages to read at the Memorial Service we were planning when we buried her remains in our yard. You were kind enough to refer us to your Comfort for Grieving Animal Lovers page, and I thank you so much for your words of comfort. I also took the time to read the articles you suggested, which soothed my sad and heavy heart.

I wrote to you again when I needed to tell my 5-year-old granddaughter what happened to Samantha. She knew our dog was old and tired, but she wasn't around when Samantha was euthanized.

Grief Healing Notified of HONcode Certification!

Certificate of Compliance

Updated September 22, 2020

I am pleased to report that both the Grief Healing Blog and the Grief Healing Discussion Groups Web sites continue to be fully compliant with Health on the Net Foundation’s HONcode. We've recently been notified that both sites are HONcode-certified, which entitles us to display the HONcode seal on the sites’ home pages for the following year.

Health On the Net (HON) was founded to encourage the dissemination of quality health information for patients and professionals, and to facilitate access to the latest and most relevant medical data through the use of the Internet. The Health On the Net (HON) Foundation is a non-governmental organization, internationally known for its pioneering work in the field of health information ethics, notably for the establishment of its code of ethical conduct, the HONcode—the oldest and most trusted code for medical and health-related information available on the Internet.

Caregiving and Hospice, August 6 - August 12, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Thinking About Dying, Even When The Doctor Has No Time For It, http://j.mp/2vy0hQi « WBUR CommonHealth

How the show 13 Reasons Why can help you in the exam room, http://j.mp/2vMmv3h « Kevin MD

Chemo side effects can destroy quality of life, http://j.mp/2vMmKM1 « Daily Mail Online

Understanding and Managing Grief, August 6 - August 12, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

A letter to … the kind stranger who shared her grief with me, http://j.mp/2vPqbSb «The Guardian

How to talk about grief in the workplace, according to a therapist, http://j.mp/2vLW3a3 « Ladders

Why Grief Is A Series of Contractions and Expansions, http://j.mp/2usodTo  « Tricycle

Coping with Pet Loss, August 6 - August 12, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

The joy, the grief, the pain: What I now understand about losing a pet, http://j.mp/2vMtbP7 « Petoskey News

How a Pet Hospice Vet Can Help Your Senior Dog, http://bit.ly/2otGHR9 « Dogster

Death of a household pet signals the end of an era, http://j.mp/2vuzjuY « Stuff

Voices of Experience: Why Self-Pity May Be Unjustified--And Unhelpful

Pure misery is a luxury one never learns to enjoy. ~ Rita Dove

Mark Henricks is a freelance journalist and musician and father of three children, including Brady Nathaniel Henricks, who died October 2, 2016 of suicide at age 16. Since losing his youngest child and only son, Mark has studied the grief research literature, searching for evidence-based bereavement coping strategies. In his effort to share with others what he has learned, he writes about these and related topics on his blog Grieve Well. The following post originally appeared there and is reprinted here with his permission.

Caregiving and Hospice, July 30 - August 5, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Fearing Hospice, http://j.mp/2uSxvt1 « Hospice Times

Medical Ethics: In The Charlie Gard Case, Listen To The Nurses, http://j.mp/2uQCJFT « CommonHealth

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, July 30 - August 5, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

'Zero Suicide': A Bold Mental-Health Initiative,  http://j.mp/2v5Yphg « The Atlantic

In Grief: When A Loved One Shares Thoughts of Suicide, http://j.mp/2vaZuHj « Grief Healing

What To Do If You Don't Know What To Do After Loss, http://j.mp/2uOovVL « The Grief Toolbox

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

In Grief: When A Loved One Shares Thoughts of Suicide

[Reviewed and updated October 9, 2024]

When a person says that he or she is thinking about suicide, you must always take the comments seriously. Assuming that the person is only seeking attention is a very serious, and potentially disastrous, error.  ~ Kevin Caruso

A reader writes: I just had a conversation with my father who is constantly talking suicide. He even gave me a date of his death - my mother's birthday. It is his revenge to everyone - mostly to mom who left because of his drinking and adultery. What am I supposed to tell him? My heart breaks, especially because I am here in this country, and my father is far away overseas. So I would not be able to even attend his funeral, as horrible as it sounds. Can you advise me on how I can cope?

Caregiving and Hospice, July 23 - July 29, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

8 Things to Do When You First Learn Your Loved One Has Alzheimer's, http://j.mp/2uKQd5 « Caring.com

For anyone who is caring for or has ever cared for anyone. Thanks to Gillette for this exquisite video on caregiving, http://j.mp/2uJTRgi « YouTube

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, July 23 - July 29, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Struggling with Grief? You Need Not Struggle Alone, http://j.mp/2uJT0wl « Self Healing Expressions

Reject the 'J' Word that Devastates Grievers, http://j.mp/2v6dr9c « Stunned By Grief

Grief Identity Crisis: Who are we now? http://j.mp/2v4DZYp « The Grief Toolbox

Teen Grief Following a Fatal Accident

Source

[Reviewed and updated July 8, 2022]

Guilt is to the spirit what pain is to the body.  ~ Elder David A. Bednar

A reader writes: My niece, nephew and my nephew’s girlfriend were in a car accident four weeks ago, and my nephew was the driver. Another car cut him off and he hit a concrete divider. His car flipped over a couple of times and his girlfriend was killed instantly. My nephew is not handling this well at all. How can I help him deal with his grief, or perhaps you can help with contacts with other individuals who have been through the same or similar loss. My nephew is 17 and his girlfriend was 17 also. Any help, information or contacts you can provide would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.