Father's Day

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Like other holidays and special days, Father's Day can be especially hard for those who are mourning the loss of a loved one. What can you do to make it easier? Here is a sampling of helpful suggestions, from several writers' different perspectives:

• I Am Still a Father: The Father's Day Birdhouse, by Glen Lord ~ "This year will be the 14th Father’s Day without my son and each year the pain of that first year is still there but now there is a joy. I continue to receive gifts from Noah on Father’s day and every day. They are the gifts of memories . . ."
  
  
• What Is Father's Day Without Fathers? by Pamela Cytrynbaum ~ "No one fills the shoes of a father. But the footprint that the man who fathered them left behind does not have to stay empty."
  
  
• Grief: Father's Day Isn't Always Easy, by Jan Warner ~  "What I ask for is a little sensitivity. In schools, in marketing, in all situations. We assume that Father's Day is full of joy for everyone . . . For those of us who have not suffered this particular loss, let us be kind today to those who have."
  
  
• Thanks to the Men Who Help Kids after Father's Day, by Christine Thiele ~ "When my husband died, I knew it would be important to my boys to have men around and in their lives. Since they would no longer have their trail guide, it was up to me to make sure men of good character, who were loving, compassionate and wise were a part of their lives. I can’t imagine a boy growing up without his dad."
  
  
• Father’s Day, by Chuck DeKlyen  ~ Some creative ideas for remembering Dad on Father’s Day.
  
  
• Ten Things to Do On Father’s Day ~ With strength fading and independence slipping away, many elderly fathers feel lost and out of place. Father’s Day offers us a great chance to celebrate and honor them but many of us have trouble with the how… There is no one answer as every father is unique but here are a few suggestions.
  
  
• Father’s Day after a Child’s Death ~ From bereaved dad Dave Roberts, some suggestions for activities that can be helpful for fathers to stay connected and to honor the legacies of their deceased child on Father’s Day.
  
  
• Father's Day Prep: Who's Your Hero When You Don't Have a Dad? ~ From The Grief Toolbox: "The truth is, no one will love you like your dad and no one could ever fill his shoes... but there are people who want to love you if you look around."
  
  
• Father’s Day, Without Dad ~ From Hospice Foundation of America, Ways to Remember Your Father, along with a tip sheet you can download here that includes Support for You and Support for a Friend Who Has Lost a Father.
  
  
• Father’s Day Grief by Maureen Hunter ~ "Our loved ones imprint themselves on us in ways that we often don’t recognise and celebrate, in ways that will remain with us always. Today this is what we have and how we can honour and remember the many beautiful special Dads on this day."
  
  
• Father’s Day Without Dad ~ "Several years ago, I asked for this piece, Father's Day without Dad, and now, each Father's Day, I re-offer it along with the more upbeat dad content. If you know a family that has lost their dad and this is their first fatherless Father's Day, please, consider sharing it."
  
  
• Father’s Day – No One to Call Me Daddy ~ From Kelly Farley, author of the newly released book, Grieving Dads: To The Brink and Back
  
  
• The Dailiness of Life by Ellie Monahan ~ "So while I won't be able to celebrate Father's Day with a card for my Dad, a tie he may never wear or a hamburger he's masterfully grilled, I will think of him this Sunday. And I will be thinking of dads everywhere enjoying their kids as well as good health, knowing my father's death has saved perhaps more than a few lives."
  
  
• Balancing The Grief and Joy of Fatherhood by David Love ~ "Father's Day will always be a bittersweet day of reflection for me. And every June, I imagine I will find myself engaged in this delicate balancing act, this cruel negotiation between the joy of being a father today, and the sense of loss over what used to be and what could have been."
  
  
• Six Ways to Deepen Your Bond with Dad This Father's Day by Dr. Ken Druck and Stephanie Druck ~ "Take it from a Dad and Daughter who know -- a simple act of love is better than a last minute gift. It’s also the kind of gift that keeps on giving. Here are 5 simple ways to strengthen your bonds with Dad on, before, or after Father’s Day."
  
  
• The Power of Remembering: My Grandfather’s Pipe ~ Written by my younger son as an entry in his journal, this story demonstrates that death may end a life, but it does not end our relationship with the one who has died.

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below.
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Related Articles:

• Tips for Coping with Anniversary Reactions in Grief
• Teen Grief: Mourning the Death of a Parent
• Helping a Grieving Parent
• Holidays: Permission to Mourn
• Grief Rituals Can Help on Special Days
• Learning about Dad, Thirteen Years Later

© by Marty Tousley, RN, MS, FT, DCC

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